A Run Through Darkness

[Lephanon]

Mwahahaha!!! Yes! It is true!!! I am creating a story from my head. Don't worry I'm not copying the story "A Walk Through Darkness". I just though it would be funny to sortof have the same title but it will be totally different. I just thought that if I was in darkness, I wouldn't be walking, man. I would be running running running to get away from all the spooky things and I wouldn't stop running until I reached the light at the end of the tunnel. So here it is....A RUN Through Darkness.

Tee Hee
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Run Through Darkness
Rated: ummm.... PG-13 for.......stuff. (don't worry)

Chapter 1

The fish jumped out of the water. The goat watched the fish. The fish made a bubble. The goat watched the bubble. The bubble popped. The fish swam around. The goat watched the fish. The fish jumped. THE GOAT GRABBED THE FISH IN HIS MOUTH AND BIT INTO IT UNTIL ITS BACKBONE SNAPPED IN HALF WITH A *crunch* AND BLOOD STARTED OOZING OUT OF THE GOATS MOUTH WHILE GUTS SPLIT OPEN THE LINING OF THE STOMACH OF THE FISH AND SPILLED OUT ONTO THE GRASS, STEAMING AND SMELLING LIKE FRESH ORC FOOD AS THE EYEBALLS SLOWLY OOZED OUT AND DRIBBLED DOWN THE SIDE OF THE FISH. It was dead. No more could the innocent fish sing "don't worry, be happy." And the sad thing is, the goat got away.

~~~~~~~~
"Houston, we have a problem!"

Houston, Texas was immediately notified of the incident, which is now called "THE INCIDENT OF THE DEMON GOAT". Only there was one small little itty bitty problem. NOBODY KNEW WHERE THE DEMON GOAT WAS.

Okay, so they searched the woods, they searched the town, they searched the county, they searched the state, they searched the entire country, so WHERE WAS HE?

Unfortunately, thats for us to know and them to find out.

Unknown by everyone, the goat was currently roaming the fields of Bob Gunderson's Gasoline Farm. Yup. Read it again. Bob Gunderson's Gasoline Farm. Unfortunately for us, that is not exactly the best place for a demon goat to hang around. But what the shart was he doing THERE?! Well, lets just say we don't have an ordinary goat on our hands, people. Actually we don't have the goat at all and that is half the problem. The other half is the fact that he is a demon goat.

So at this exact minute he's strolling around the many barrels of gasoline while the FBI and CIA are searching lush, grassy fields and calm, serene riverbanks. So what is wrong with this picture?

Probably the fact that they just underestimated a stupid.....*ahem*.....smart demon goat and thought he would be just like all the other demon goats in this world. Thats right. There aren't any. So they are thinking he will act just like a NORMAL goat and be attracted to grass and water. Right? Wrong!

This goat was planning something and nobody knew what it was. No one knew what terror this goat could bring. No one knew what torture this goat-demon goat- could cause! All because of the stupid, silly, people who thought he was like all the other goats. Well, that's not happening today!

So what would a demon goat want with a bunch of gasoline? There he is, strolling down the path among the many barrels and boxes and bottles of dangerous, explosive, not to mention expensive, gasoline.

Well, we should be thankful it isn't a nuclear power plant. Who knows what kind of terror he would cause if he got his paws.....er.....hooves on that! So here we are, folks, watching and waiting for the inevitable to happen. Is this our doom? Could this be the end of the world? Watch and wait and you will soon find out!

We will see you next time on A Run Through Darkness.

[Aman]

that was AWESOME! i couldn't stop laughing. we should make that into a movie lol

[Lephanon]

Welcome back to A Run Through Darkness

Last time we found out that our demon goat was hanging out at a gasoline farm. Now today we will continue the story and see just how far this demon goat is willing to go....

Chapter 2

The demon goat had a plan. Yes, a very evil plan. After months and months of devious and evil planning, he finally had a plan. But what exactly was this evil plan of his? Was it to wipe out the entire human population on earth? No. Was it to take over the world and make every human being his slave to his will? No. Was it to kick mega human butt and become the new emperor of the entire universe? Once again, no. Then what was his evil and devious plan? Well, simply put: To deprive the world of cheddar cheese.

Yes, a very evil plan indeed. It may surprise you, but this criminal mastermind was not about to give up on his childhood dream. Ever since he was a young kid he'd been desperate to save all the cheddar cheese in the world from an aweful fate: being eaten. Yes, this demon goat was ready to do anything to save his cheese. Even if it meant destroying the universe.

So now at about 2:00 AM this demon goat of ours loaded up a huge truck full of gasoline. And not just any gasoline. It was Bob Gunderson's gasoline. Yes, read it again. Bob Gunderson's gasoline. So now after an hour or two of loading up the truck the demon goat put the pedal to the metal and VROOOOM!!! Obviously he isn't a very good driver because man, it must be hard reaching that gas pedal. But he certainly isn't afraid of speed because at this very moment he's zooming down the highway going 95 mph on the wrong side of the road. Boy, does this demon goat need help. Not only does he have one heck of a lead foot but he's only used to driving in Britain!!! This should be interesting.

Well, folks, lets switch cameras and see what the CIA and FBI are doing at this exact moment in time.

Currently the CIA are searching a small town known to raise many different goats and make goat cheese. Houston, we have a problem. And that problem is the fact that Houston has a problem and they aren't fixing it yet! Oh, well. Maybe the FBI are getting a good lead.

As we zoom in on the FBI you can see that they are taking a lunch break in a meadow known to have many wild goats. Wild goats?! The only wild goat you need to be tracking down is a certain demon goat and he obviously isn't here! Let's have a word with the Chief Investigator on this case.

Bob the Reporter: Well, Chief how are things turning out with The Incident of the Demon Goat?

Chief: Not too good, Bob. We don't have a single lead as to where he is right now. His tracks were washed away by a small rain shower that came through an hour after he left. There's been no sign of him since.

Bob the Reporter: It seems as though everyone is tired already. Why is that?

Chief: Tracking this goat has been extemely exhausting and since there are no clues as to where he is right now we've had to work twice as hard just to uncover 3 clues where he was originally sighted.

Bob the Reporter: And what are those clues?

Chief: We found this single goat hair on a bush by the river. And we also found a goat tooth that was inside the fish he attacked earlier. It is unusually long and fang-like. Very uncommon for an herbivore goat. Of course, after seeing this fish, we can assume that he is no herbivore.

Bob the Reporter: Yes, this goat is definitely no vegitarian. Now what was the third clue you found?

Chief: Well, this third clue has everyone puzzled because it makes no sense. It is this small piece of chedder cheese that was next to the goat hair. It appears as though it was in contact with the goat at some point in time. There are also teeth marks that indicate he was carrying it in his mouth. He must have left it by the river when he left in such a hurry.

Bob the Reporter: This is the mystery of all mysteries. Well, we wish you luck on your case and hope you get many more leads as to where the goat is.

Chief: Thank you

Well, as you can see, there is very little information as to where the goat is at this exact moment. Of course, being the main information source of this story, we know where he is. So lets get back to that demon goat on the highway.

The demon goat is definitely causing chaos. Not only is he causing cars to swerve off the road into the ditch, but he's also got the police department involved. Just what we needed.

Sirens wailing, lights flashing, here come the police at this very moment! Not to mention several ambulances for the cars who biffed it and went into the ditch. So what will this crazy son of a goat do?

Oh, I can't belive it! He's pulling over! He's stopped the truck! Now the police officers are getting out of their cars and walking, guns out, toward the gasoline loaded truck.

So what does the demon goat do? He hops out onto the roof of the truck and leaps into the back of the truck among the gasoline barrels! Seeing the many many barrels of gasoline, the police don't shoot, scared that they might put a bullet hole in one and start a fire. But was this what the demon goat had planned? We shall soon see. Using a series of back hand springs, front flips, and a couple summersaults, the demon goat, who is also very good at Kung Fu, makes his way onto the hood of one of the police cars. Before any of the police officers could say "Oh crap I've just gotten outsmarted by a demon goat," he was into the car and driving down the highway, sirens wailing into the night, leaving many stunned police officers behind him.

So is this demon goat very smart or what? He has just gotten a car that has the ability of going 95 mph and not get stopped by the police! But will his good luck last him long? And how long will it take for the police, FBI, or CIA to track him down?

Well, we shall find out soon when we see you next time on A Run Through Darkness.

To be continued...

[Lephanon]

Welcome back to...
A Run Through Darkness

Last time on A Run Through Darkness we found out that this demon goat of ours was planning a very devious plan: to deprive the world of cheddar cheese. He narrowly escaped the police after jumping into one of their police cars. Now lets catch up to him and see the latest action...

~~~~~~~~~
VROOOOM!!!!!!!!!
The demon goat sped down the interstate going 95 and accelerating faster and faster and faster....faster.....FASTER!!!!!!!!!

"Man, did you see his engine?!" exclaimed an innocent stand-byer. "Smoke was pouring from the hood! People were running and screaming as if they wouldn't see another day!"

But that day would come.

Lets catch up to Bob the Reporter again and hear the latest news.

Igor the Newscaster: "So Bob, what is the most recent event involving the demon goat?"

Bob the Reporter: "Well, Igor, it seems as though things are getting crazier by the minute. Just when we thought there could be peace on earth, this demon goat comes along and causes a havoc people haven't seen since Japan bombed Pearl Harbor. Currently our demon goat is smashing through the friendly town of Yamhill in a police car."

Igor the Newscaster: "Yamhill?! What on earth is he doing in Yamhill?!"

Bob the Reporter: "Apparently in 1793 George Washington came to Yamhill and ate dinner. During dinner he was served wine and cheddar cheese. He didn't eat it all and it is now stored in a museum there. Unfortunately, the demon goat has obviosly heard about this famous cheese and has come to "rescue" it from the museum."

Igor the Newscaster: "Well, lets go now to the scene of the crime and see how our friendly goat is doing."

~~~~~~~~~

Yamhill was a mess. The demon goat had cars turned over, street lights knocked down, and milk jugs stuffed in toilets. Yes, Yamhill was a mess and everyone was in despair.....well......everyone but the demon goat, that is.

He found his famous cheddar cheese and traded his police car in for a newer model....only this one was shiny, bright red corvette. Yes, he was living the life, that's for sure.

As he drove down the rode, who knows what evil thoughts were going through his demon mind. But the question is.........Do we WANT to know?!

Night is falling
The stars are shining
And somewhere in this crazy world a demon goat is on the loose looking for cheddar cheese and will stop at nothing until he finds it all. Isn't that a comforting thought?

~~~The Next Day~~~

The next day...

Screeeeech!!!!!
*plop*
BOOOOOOOOM!!!!!
~splash!~
Kaching!
BANG!

"Bill! Stop playing with the sound effects! We're on in 3....2....1....Welcome back ladies and gentlemen to A Run Through Darkness! All was well during the night although there was an evil demon goat on the loose. We are here to give you 24 hour news and updates on the events that take place involving our mysterious demon goat. There seems to have been a lull in the action and no clues as to the whereabouts of the demon goat. We will be taking a short break here and get back to you in a moment. Don't forget: this is DEMON GOAT News. Quality you come to expect. Coverage you can count on. Now back to Fred with the weather."

~~~~~~~~~~

Oh, somewhere in this favored land the sun is shining bright.
Children laughing cheerfully and people's hearts are light.
But soon the time will come again
When demon goats are killing men.
And when this time does come...
We'll kick his butt and then some.
But he's not here and we're not there.
So perhaps it would be easier to...go hug a bear!
~~~~~~~~~
That is all for today, folks!
Tune in next time to...
A Run Through Darkness
(I promise I'll have something about running and darkness later on in the story)
To Be Continued...

[Lephanon]

A Run Through Darkness

Chapter 4
~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Aww, mom! There isn't anything on TV to watch!!!" complained Billy.

"Don't tell me that!" argued his mom. "We have over 90 channels! You should be able to find SOMETHING to watch!"

"But MOM! There just isn't ANYTHING to watch!" Billy said again.

"Now Billy, how many times have I told you this? There are plenty of TV shows to watch. Just pick one and sit down. And if you can't do that then find something creative to do or read a book! You might actually LEARN something."

And with that, his Mom quickly left the room, leaving Billy to find something "creative" to do. So what will he choose? Where will he go? What will he do?

Find out soon when "Haunting of the Child" returns after these messages.

Igor the Newscaster turned off the television and slumped down into the oversized lazyboy chair.

"What a stupid show!" he exclaimed. "What a stupid channel! And KEWL News thinks that they are the #1 news station around! Well, think again because DEMON GOAT News has surpassed you all! You hear that?! YOU ALL!!! Mwahahaha!"

*silence*

A sudden gust of wind suddenly blows out a candle, the only light in the entire house, making the room pitch black.

*Creeeeeeak* (the sound of an opening door)

"Who's there?!" Igor the Newscaster jumps up quickly, knocking over a lamp and shattering it on the floor.

*silence*

"Is anybody there?" Igor tip-toes to the door, which has a dim light under it, casting eerie shadows throughout the room.
He slowly reaches for the doorknob when suddenly.....

It opens!

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!"

Igor the Newscaster and Bob the Reporter stand screaming at eachother in fright.

"Why did you scare me?!" Yells Igor the Newscaster.

"Why did YOU scare ME?!" Yells Bob the Reporter.

"What are you doing in my house at 12:00 Midnight?!" exclaims Igor the Newscaster.

Bob the Reporter calms down enough to explain what he is doing in Igor's house at such an insane time.

"There has been a sudden breakthrough on "The Incident of the Demon Goat" he explained. "The CIA and FBI have just found some very valuable clues as to what the goat is doing and where he is going next. Only the bad thing is...before they could do anything about it the demon goat has moved into action! The demon goat has struck again!!!"

*A moment of silence while all this information absorbs into Igor's brain.*

"Where's he at now?!" Igor exclaimed excitedly.

"At the intersection of highway 83 and Interstate 45," Bob explained. "The reporters are already there! Come on!"

Bob didn't have to tell Igor twice. He was already putting on his jacket and grabbing the keys to his car.

"Lets move!"

~~~~~~~~~~~
At the intersection of highway 83 and Interstate 45...

Flashing lights of police cars pierce through the air. An overturned pumpkin truck lays on its side, smashed pumpkins scattered throughout the road blocking traffic on both the interstate and the highway.

Policeman: Get the truck off the bridge! Repeat: Get the pumpkin truck OFF the bridge!!!

Cool Dude Policeman #2: Roger that.

Reporter Bob: And the demon goat strikes again! This time not only in one place, but 2! This overturned pumpkin truck has created a roadblock across highway 83 and the pumpkins have created a second one by scattering and falling off the bridge onto the busy interstate 45! These unual hazards have caused several minor accidents to occur within the past hour.

~~~~~~~~~~
Now lets switch point of views to our friend, the demon goat.
~~~~~~~~~~
At a Wal-Mart Superstore somewhere downtown in suburb called Moosepond.

Wal-Mart lady: I need a price check for diapers over here!

Shopper: Help! Please help! There's a person stuck in the automatic doors over there! Help!

*snickers come from the demon goat hiding in the dairy section*

Wal-Mart lady: AHHH! What are we going to do?!?!

*Wal-Mart lady faints and accidentally lands on fire alarm*

THE FIRE ALARM GOES OFF!!!!

Shoppers start screaming everywhere and running around like crazy.

Soon the sprinklers come on, getting everyone and everything soaked. Children are crying and people are yelling and trying to get out...but they can't! The automatic doors are now jammed! ...And the person is STILL stuck in them.

Voice on Wal-Mart P.A. System: Attention Wal-Mart customers! Please stay calm! We will have everything fixed in a moment! Just please stay calm! Attention Wal-Mart employees! Backup is needed in the women's restroom for the repair and cleanup of several plugged toilets. Also, there is a white Chevy Impala in the parking lot with their headlights on. Thank You.

The fire department arrives and turns off the sprinkler system. The red cross arrives and hands out free towels and ramen noodles to all the soaked customers.

...And the demon goat with his evil diversion easily got away with ALL the cheddar cheese in Wal-Mart.

But... his biggest plan is yet to come!

Stay tuned to DEMON GOAT News and A Run Through Darkness to see what happens next!
MORE action!
MORE suspense!
MORE evil demon goat tries to deprive the world of cheddar cheese plans!

This is DEMON GOAT News signing out.
...To Be Continued.

****Extra!****
Coming up in Chapter 5!
...more demon goat stuff
...bigger action and more evil plans
...the answer to why the demon goat REALLY attacked the fish in the beginning of the first chapter! (if you don't remember the fish....read the 1st paragraph of the 1st chapter again) Because you'll need to know about the fish for future stuff that happens in the story!!!
*dun dun dun*

And that concludes our broadcast day!

[Lephanon]

Attention!:

Before I begin the 5th chapter I would like to explain something first. The 5th chapter is going to be a little weird because it is not like the other chapters. Chapter 5 will be divided into 2 parts: Part 1 and Part 2. Part 1 will be a story about the fish and explain some things that you will have to know to understand the rest of the story.

This is only Part 1 so it is only a history (not boring like in school) about the fish and the goat and...you'll see.

A Run Through Darkness

Chapter 5/Part 1: The Truth About the Fish


Many people may wonder, and few may know, the truth about the fish. THE fish. The fish that the demon goat attacked. The event that started it all.

But now you are probably asking me..."What is the big deal about the fish? The goat attacked him. He died. So what?!"

Well, the truth is, it is really the fish that started it all. Not the demon goat like you have been lead to think, but actually it is...the Demon Fish!!!

Yes, you may be thinking that I'm a little crazy right now... but I'm not. This is the truth. Where do you think the demon goat got his demon powers? Yes, the fish. The demon fish. THE demon fish. OK...so what does that have to do with a demon goat running around and depriving the world of cheddar cheese?!

First of all, it is not the goat's fault. It is all the demon fish's fault. But before we go around pointing fingers at people let me tell you a story. A very ancient story.
It begins like this...

Once upon a moon, where the twilight sparkled merrily and the rivers flowed freely through the forests of trees, there was a place called...Lebayoo. Lebayoo was no place known to man, but rather, a place known to fish and river creatures of all kinds. Yes, this was a beautiful home to many fish, and most of all, to a fish named... Bob the Bass.

Now don't go making fun of Bob the Bass before you even know him! He is very sensitive about his name so be quiet about it or else he will cry! Anyways...on with the story!

Bob the Bass lived a peaceful life, away from all the other fish- and he liked it that way. The calm, the quiet. The calm, the quiet. The calm, the quiet. Ok...so his life wasn't all that great. No, it was horrible, aweful, downright BORING! All he wanted was a place in the beautiful waters of Lebayoo. But all the other fish turned him down. "You are stupid," they'd say. "You are a loser! We don't like you!"

After awhile, all those nasty things people were saying to him got to his head...and it started morphing...morphing...changing and mutating and morphing his mind, his brain, his only real common sense until....BANG BOOM BLAST! He was Bob the Bass no more.

What happened to him and why did all that happen? Some say he was crazy, others say he was demented. Some say he just needed some serious help. Wow watch out, people! There is a mental fish out there somewhere!

But anyhow, what ever it was that happened that day, nobody could reverse it...not even Bob the Bass himself. Not that he wanted to anyway. His mind slowly morphed over the years, slowly but surely it got wicked, evil, and even more horrid than the most horrid fish in Lebayoo. Until one day...he completely lost it.

He turned into a living terror, destroying Lebayoo and doing more evil than most fish could even think of, but he wasn't finished. Not by a long shot.

His body started getting old...older...and older...until he eventually replaced his old body parts with new ones- ones that were machines. His mind was still good, running like it always had- but now he was more machine than fish...a mechanical fish. But in his mind he knew that he was still a fish- and a very evil fish at that.

But he was missing something- something terrible. Something evil, horrible, completely nasty that nobody else had. What was that thing? Nobody knew. Not even Bob the Bass himself. So he thought, and thought, until his fins got rusty and his gills got stiff. Eventually he replaced his mechanical parts with newer, more recent ones. But still, he knew he needed something.

Years passed and he was still searching for that special something that he needed. During the time he spent thinking he constructed a new fish body for himself- one that could work in land AND water. Mwahahaha! An evil plan indeed!

By the time it was finished he found the one thing he was missing- a plan! An evil, horrible, aweful plan that people would cringe to hear. And what was that plan? TO RULE THE WORLD!!!

(like you've never heard of THAT before)

Yes, this was his plan, but it was far from being done. So he went up to the surface and decided to make a list of the things he needed to do. Bob the Bass then walked to the nearest Wal-Mart in the nearby town of Rilleyburg. There he bought some yellow post-it notes to make his list on.

So what was his list? Well, it looked like this:

1. Get a new name for myself- an evil name.
2. Explore the terrain and get ideas for plan.
3. Think about the plan.
4. Find the weaknesses of humans who seem to rule this world.
5. Search the world for a place to put HQ (headquarters).
6. Get an apprentice- maybe.
7. Stock up on Cheetos.
8. Buy more food for Jeffory. (his pet slug)
9. Put indoor plumbing into HQ.
10. Buy 2-ply toilet paper ONLY!

"Hmmm...this looks like a very good list so far," said Bob the Bass. "Lets see...first thing...find a new name. A new name...a new name.....hmmm..."

He scratched his head in thought. Then he scratched his chin. Then his ankle. Then his bellybutton.

"Wait! I don't HAVE a bellybutton! How can I scratch my bellybutton when I don't even HAVE a bellybutton!"

Well, SORRY Mr. Bass I didn't know.

Bob the Bass stood there in thought. My name has to be perfect, powerful, and overall EVIL!
"How about...Theodore the Magnificent!"
"No."
"Alexander the Great!"
"Already taken."
"Edgar the Horrible!"
"Too monster-like."
"Josephina the Mighty!"
"Too girly."
"Dracula!"
"Not a vampire."
"King Henry VIII!"
"Too royal."
"Why am I talking to myself?!"
"Too...I don't know."
"Hmmmm...It has to be...I KNOW!!! My name will be...
TOTAL ANNIHILATOR!"

Now that THAT is over with...

Lets fast forward to a time when our friendly goat comes into the picture.

~~~~~~~~~~
10 Years Later...

Somewhere in Siberia in an abandoned castle.
(complete with cannons, drawbridge, and moat)

Total Annihilator decided to create his HQ in the most remote place possible- an abandoned castle in Siberia. Mwahahaha!!!
Now not only did he have indoor plumbing and 2-ply toilet paper but also an evil plan. Now the only thing he needed was an apprentice. But not just any apprentice. It had to be one that wouldn't become a rebel and kill his master like in Star Wars. (gotta see it to get it)
Yes, he needed one to follow his every command and help him RULE THE WORLD.

So he put his evil plan into action.
First of all, he created a clone of himself, but without the machinery. This clone fish would contain all of Total Annihilator's demon powers. It just wouldn't have the robotic stuff in its body mwahahaha.

Now...in a village not too far away lived a goat. Yes, and as you can guess, this goat will soon become our demon goat. In a small stream near the village, Total Annihilator (aka: Bob the Bass) put his clone demon fish into the stream, to lure the goat toward it. Attracted to the mysterious demon powers the clone fish had, the goat went to investigate.

'Ooh,' thought the goat. 'Look at the pretty fish! Look at the pretty bubble!'

Before he knew what was happening, the goat was grabbing the clone demon fish and biting it and squeezing it until...it was dead.

So what happened to those demon powers? No, they did not die or disappear with the fish. Instead they were injected into the goat, aka: demon goat. Now this once beautiful and harmless creature was mad and crazy and evil like the Total Annihilator himself.

Total Annihilator brought the demon goat back to his HQ. (which is why the goat disappeared so fast).

Total Annihilator then teleported him to America, where he could do further damage to the world and create a distration while HE, the Total Annihilator, worked out a far more devious and destructing plan.

Yes, folks, and you know the rest of the story. How the CIA and FBI and Houston, Texas were notified of the incident and sent out to capture this demon goat. And how they tried, unsuccessfully to discover many clues and uncover the real reason why this demon goat was, well, a demon.

But through this all one question still remains unanswered: Why the cheese?

Well, the answer is very simple: Why not?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And the story continues...
Thank you for watching this segment of A Run Through Darkness: The Truth About The Fish.

We will get back to the rest of the story of the demon goat in Chapter 5: Part 2.
Yes, that one will be much funnier and less...serious. This one was more boring and...you know.

This is A Run Through Darkness: Signing Out.

[Megs aka Luthien]

WOW, maybe you should make a book about this. It's so good and funny I love it.